Freakshow
by ReySolo
Summary: Songfic to Ani Difranco’s “Freakshow.” Trowa contemplating. Life in the circus ain’t easy… (implied shonen-ai 3+4)


Summary: Songfic to Ani Difranco's "Freakshow." Trowa contemplating. Life in the circus ain't easy… (implied shonen-ai 3+4)

"Freakshow" is a kinda strange, but cool song. If you want to listen to it, you can get the mp3 from my website at http://reyzone.ramen43.com/freakshow.htm

Disclaimer: The G-boys don't belong to me… ::sigh:: I make no money off of this, so please don't sue.

Freakshow  
by ReySolo

_ life in the circus ain't easy  
but the folks on the outside don't know  
yeah the tent goes up  
and the tent comes down  
and all that they see is the show_

Trowa stood spread out against the wood, watching unblinking as Catherine prepared to throw another knife. There was no emotion whatsoever showing in his eyes, but he was thinking. About the circus, about the audience. No one out there knew about him. They assumed he was just another clown in the show. Just another guy in silly makeup, standing silently as knives fly by him, performing death-defying leaps... He supposed this job seemed dangerous, but compared to his real work outside the circus, this was child's play.

_ and the ladies on the horses look so pretty  
and the lions are lookin real mad  
and some of the clowns are happy  
and some of the clowns are sad_

But did this make him happy? Sure, he stayed with the circus simply for cover; it was unlikely OZ would think to look for any of those cursed terrorists, the Gundam pilots, in a traveling circus. And he was good at what he did, from being a target for Catherine's knife-throwing, to taking care of the lions, to the acrobatics. But was he truly happy?

_ but underneath  
there's another expression  
that the makeup isn't making  
life under the big top  
it's about freedom  
it's about faking  
there's an art to the laughter  
there's a science  
and there's a lot of love  
and compliance_

The truth was, he enjoyed several aspects of working here. Despite the acts put on for the crowds, the workers here were all honest, hard-working, normal people. He got along with almost everyone here. He especially enjoyed Catherine's company; she was like a sister to him.

_ welcome to the freakshow  
here we go_

_we live to hear the slack-jawed gasping  
we live under a halo of held breath  
and when the children raise up a giant shield of laughter  
it's like they're fending off death_

He also did appreciate the actual shows. Knowing that people could enjoy the simple pleasures of watching some acrobats performing some simple leaps and flips, despite the war raging outside… There was just something soothing about that, making him feel as if he was helping without having to go out there and infiltrate an enemy base, or pilot Heavyarms and blow things up.

_ oh, and we can make something bigger  
than any one of us alone  
and then the clowns will take off their makeup  
and the people will go home_

But did he really belong here? With his mask and bright clothing, being cheered on by happy crowds? Was that small effort toward making people happy worth staying here? Was he really needed here?

_ life on the outside ain't easy  
no sequins, no elephants,  
no parading around  
oh, the circus comes  
and circus goes  
and they're stuck in this f***ing town_

A few days later, Trowa stood outside the fairgrounds, bidding Catherine goodbye. She waved hugged him tightly and ordered him to take care of himself, while he once again stood emotionlessly. He had another mission: he was to meet up with Quatre and they would sneak into an OZ base, gather information on some new weapon they were planning, then destroy the facility. They would be quick, efficient, and deadly.

_ you need a lotta  
love and compliance  
you need a lotta_

When he reached the designated meeting place, Quatre raced up to him, pulling him into a hug. The blond Arab grinned widely, telling him how he'd been deeply missed, before the two began to discuss the specifics of the mission.

Despite the ugliness of the war and death surrounding them, Trowa realized that this was where he belonged. Here, with Quatre. His love.

_ welcome to the freakshow  
here we go_

_ love…_

~owari~

Please, R&R! :)


End file.
